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Happy Friday blog readers! It feels great to be back blogging and I've almost got my sea legs back after that nine month sabbatical. Recently, I bought a new laptop since I decided that my current one was not up to snuff. The former laptop might have been the shittiest computer in use for a variety of reasons.

1) It was pink. I am a man-child, and being seen with a fuchsia colored laptop is not exactly "manly." My current laptop is jet black, like my heart.

2) The fan was shitty. It would overheat after only 30 minutes and use my thigh as it's own personal flesh griddle.

3) The battery sucked. It was basically a desktop computer since the battery would only last for about 20 minutes before it passed out and became an ugly, heavy paperweight.

4) It was missing the letter "A" and the "Enter" key. These are probably the most popular keys used when typing on a computer, so having to hit the same key multiple times like an unruly stepchild became very cumbersome when attempting to write a blog.

5) It was a whore... in a technical sense. Adware, spam, viruses; you name it, it had it. It was used up and spit out. If my computer was a woman it would Courtney Love.

I am very excited to have a new laptop that runs fast and is not fucking pink. This will probably not improve my spelling or grammatical woes, but should make it easier for my to bust out blogs with references to genitalia.

Also, I added Disqus to my blog to make it easier for people to leave comments. This way you don't have to sign up for a Google account or punch in some strange phrase to prove you're not an evil spam robot. This gives you no excuse not to comment. I will be expecting between 100-150 comments on my next post, so do not disappoint.

I should have the final chapter of "The Worst Day" up early next week so keep an eye out.


paddy.